A Teaspoon Of Happiness

He sat on his bed staring into nothing. His one hand rested on his knee while the other hand supported a mobile next to his ear. He was hearing not even listening, hardly speaking, sometimes a phrase or two only to let the person on the other side of the line know that he was there and that She wasn’t talking to thin air.

“Hey are you listening to me?” she said apparently realizing the guy was actually staring into nothing rather wasn't listening.

“Karan I’ve been speaking for the last 15 minutes and you haven’t even reacted once! I’m discussing our wedding with you but you just don’t seem interested! What is it? Tell me! Do you need more time to settle yourself with this decision of yours?”

Well he heard her say that and replied, “wha... what? No! Why would you say that? I’m all set and yes want to marry you! Why are you saying that?”

“Then why can’t see you happy? You are not the same like you were earlier! You are not in contact with any of your friends not even your family... you aren’t happy!”

“I am happy!”

“No!”

“Okay shut up! I only had one friend all through my life and today she isn’t a part of it”

“Karan, Sara won’t come ....” before she could complete her statement Karan cut her short,” What the heck is your problem woman? Don’t you understand the meaning of “shut up”. I know Sara won’t come back! You can please spare me this enlightenment everyday every hour of our conversation.  I am marrying you isn't that enough for you? You will be my wife! Please be happy with this! You are not even a bit of Sara and you can never be! Don’t try to be her! Just be at your place and let me be! I know she is not going to come back! A matter of fact: you are going to marry a socially pervert human being so don’t expect me to be a party ass after marriage! “

A silence followed which was broken by the girl’s audible tears.

SILENCE

“I know ... I’m not Sara” between tears “and ... I can’t be”

“Hey I’m so sorry” said Karan

“It’s okay! I just...... just need some time out! Bye!” and she disconnected.

Karan sat there thinking what he had just done. He couldn’t feel more disgusted.

“F*** man! It wasn’t......” he swore and threw his mobile at full swing.

He just couldn’t face it! He was in a pathetic condition. He just couldn’t bring himself to put it this way “Sara is gone”. He punched his fist into the wall. He had never imagined his being without her. His only friend! And angry too! He was frustrated, baffled and pissed off with himself.  He knew that he was lonely.

He had a depressing space around him that was not allowed to be trespassed! No exceptions! Not even his fiancée!

Karan was once a guy who didn’t know any limits, no frigging tensions, no cry for a lawyer degree et al! He only had one friend back then, Sara. She was more of a mother, agony aunt than a friend. Sara often used to joke about not being a part of his life in future and he would kick the joke saying “I won’t let you go”.

Now that she was gone, he is living within the boundaries created by him, for himself: an aimless life! Aimless coz he was at the zenith of his work...Rich, a trophy fiancée, all the luxuries at command. He had everything one could only dream.

One basic ingredient for a perfect life had gone missing in him- a teaspoon of happiness.

Karan was thinking about his condition when all of a sudden he was zapped back into the reality by a knock on his door. He couldn’t help but shout,” What Peter (his servant) ?”

Peter opened the door and entered, “Sir! There is an Indian girl waiting for you downstairs. She says she knows you. “

“who?”

“She says she is a friend of your friend”

Karan raised his eyebrows. “Cool! Tell her to get lost”

“Sir! I told her to leave but she wouldn’t listen.”

“oh! What the...! Fine I am coming”

Karan descended the staircase and saw that girl. He gestured her to sit down. They both sat and after formal greetings Karan asked’,” Who are you?”

“Siya” The girl answered.”I am a friend of Sara since college. Do you remember me?”

Karan couldn’t help but say “No”

“i thought so! A person who can make Sara’s friend wait for two hours can obviously not remember me.” came the reply.

“Why are you here?”

“Not a very nice way to converse Mr Karan Oberio”

“Any friend of Sara will be treated like this only”

“Why? What is her friend’s fault if she is not with you anymore?”

“She is not with you even”

“She didn’t tell me to get out of her life like you Karan”

“Mr Oberio would do”

“Oh! Sorry Mr Oberio rather i am so sorry for your so perfect ending with Sara”

“Hey woman! You are crossing the line there!”

“Line? Whoa! Sara’s Karan has lines? As in boundaries? Now that’s kind of apocalyptic”

“Cut the crap! Tell me why you are here?”

“I am here because Sara needs your help”

“What?” he looked at her confused n tempered “why the fuck should I help her?”

“Don’t use that crude language!”

He didn’t listen to her, “why the hell should I help her? She fucking told me to kick my ass out of her life now why does she need my help? She doesn’t know how does it feel like to be alone and friendless. She doesn’t know what a fucked up life is like?”

“Shut up!” Siya had heard enough. “Shut up! You are such an animal! I really pity your fiancée! You know you never deserved Sara’s friendship but still you are closest to her till this second! Even her hus.... No! You don’t deserve to know all this! You don’t deserve to know if she is alive or dead or even close to it! Have you ever wondered why did she tell you to kick yourself out of her life? Ever thought why would she call a quit to a beautiful friendship you people shared? I’ve known her for much lesser time but i know that Sara never does anything without a force!”

She got up to leave, started walking towards the door. She cursed herself underneath her breath “guess I cant behave like this right now”. She saw a writing pad at a table nearby. She picked it up and wrote something on it.

“This is Sara’s address. Let me tell you she is in a desperate need of her closest friend”, saying this she threw the pad at Karan and left.

After a gruelling session with his brain Karan finally decided to “drop by” at Sara’s place. It was an hour drive from his house at Middleton alley in New York. It was there he lived away from his friends, foe and family.. away from the world he knew!

He drove and all the while thinking and mumbling, “ I will just say hi and get going after all she told me to disappear from her life!”  

After a few minutes..”No! I will also ask her the reason for chucking me! I was the one who was chucked so I need to know!” Saying this he stopped his car at a florist’s shop. HE decided on buying lilies, ”Yeah she has always loved them” and smiled, “ but hey! I am not buying anything that makes her feel good! What about all those times when i was rotting without her! No flowers!”

He got back into his car and started driving. After an hour or so he reached “26/28 Downtown Drive New York , House of Aditya Rai and Sara Rai” he read on the address slab next to the entrance of the house “just an hour away from me” he said with disgust.

He entered through the gate, crossed the garden straight to the door and knocked it. After a minute or two a servant answered the door, ”Yes! How can I help you?”

“I want to meet Mrs Sara Rai”, don’t know what played him but he said that with digesting anger.

“Ma’am doesn’t want to meet anyone. You can leave”, came back a stern reply.

“Listen servant or whatever you are! I have to meet her! I am her friend, the closest one!”  He forced his way inside the house.

“Where is she?”

She didn’t reply.

“WHERE IS SHE?” Karan shouted at her.

“Sir! First floor, second ...”

Before she could complete Karan went running up the staircase to the second room.

He knocked at the door politely. There was no reply. He again knocked. No reply.

His temples were throbbing.

 Noticing the door open, he quietly pushed open the door and entered.

He scanned the room, the wardrobes, the table, chair, curtains, and the bed at which his gaze stopped for a split second. He grinded his lower teeth clenched his fists. He advanced towards it when he saw her.

SARA.

Sara was sitting at the flattened window sill. Her knees were hunched up. Her hands were crossed and resting on her knees. Her head rested on her hands and was facing towards the window. Her hair were open lose. Karan kept staring at her. She donned a white kurta salwar with a dupatta.

Karan stood there and kept looking at her. He then realized... this was not what he knew rather who he knew! His Sara was always a happy person. She could never sit still. She was so particular about everything that she could clean up an already clean room. A hell of topics she had to speak and was so obstinate that she could get anyone on their knees and make them apologise for the mistakes they haven’t even committed. Karan himself had apologised many times for no rhyme.

He realized that she was not the same. He went out of the room and called the servant. He asked her what happened to Sara. To which the servant replied, “Sir! My sir! Aditya died in a car crash”

This kicked the daylight out of Karan.

“Sir! Ma’am hasn’t eaten anything for a week. Every day she gets up and just goes and sits on that window sill. She hasn’t left that room for over a week now. She doesn’t speak nor does she eat. Ma’am just sits there. Siya Madam came yesterday but she didn’t respond to her even!”

He felt pathetic! A block of words had gone down his stomach. He couldn’t speak.

“Wh.... when did this ha.. happen?”

“Ten days ago”

He left her and went inside the room. He saw her.

He couldn’t explain. He felt pathetic. All that anger, all that frustration, all the blames.. everything made him feel horrible, poignant. He saw her staring out of the window, staring into the horizon. She didn’t move. Karan could tell that her eyes were saying it all. He saw her reflection on the closed window.  She could see the people, the world around her moving at its own pace. Selfish! Her life had come to a stand! She couldn’t make it move! The burden was heavy! Too much to put in correct mould!     Yes her eyes said it all. The pain, the broken pieces of her world that lay around....

He gathered all the courage that he had and said, “Sara”

She heard it! She heard everything everyone used to say to her! She heard him!

“Sara”

Her eyes moved. Her mantle responded. It hadn’t since a week.

“Sara?”

She turned her head and saw Karan. He stood there aware of her. Sara got down from the window sill and tried to stand. Karan saw her and then the distance between them dawned on him. He could clearly see the distance between them that had emerged from their estranged relationship. He couldn’t cross over.

Sara was in no senses to reason anything. She didn’t remember anything, couldn’t remember anything.  She looked at him as a tear trickled down her eyes!

Karan looked into her eyes with all the love that he had for her. Indeed it was difficult to step forward! He casted his eyes into hers with all the love he could spill. His eyes swelled with tears!

Sara walked. She walked towards him stepping over all the distance. She covered it up for him.

Sara came close to him. She hugged him.

That moment the universe stood still!

 Karan so badly wanted his friend back! Back in his arms! They stood like that! Finally Sara found comfort!

Karan hugged her back. He embraced the distance between them and placed one hand on her head! Sara felt so familiar! She started crying!

He closed his eyes n stood there with her. It was till eternity that the universe stood still! It was till eternity that they re-discovered each other, lost in their own small worlds. They both just let the magic of friendship and love plays its game again.

It was the moment where nobody spoke, the pain understood!

It was the tick of truth!

The moment where “a teaspoon of happiness” was found!

                                                                                                                                

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